My Name is Legion (Dennis Aubrey)

Last night was one of those long, dark nights where sleep is impossible and the mind roils and spins. At times like this, there are words and phrases that enter unbidden into my mind and will not leave. For years, the phrase Abyssus abyssum invocat or its French version, L’abîme appelle l’abîme has been a visitor in my dark nights. I wrote this post that reflects the obsession with the words, asking “Is this a need inside of us, as if we fear the abyss, fear the emptiness, fear the darkness of an eternal night?”

Last night, for some reason, a newcomer phrase made its appearance; “My name is Legion” came to me over and over and demanded investigation. The source is, of course, Mark Chapter 5.

“And they came over unto the other side of the sea, into the country of the Gadarenes. And when he was come out of the ship, immediately there met him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit, Who had his dwelling among the tombs; and no man could bind him, no, not with chains: Because that he had been often bound with fetters and chains, and the chains had been plucked asunder by him, and the fetters broken in pieces: neither could any man tame him. And always, night and day, he was in the mountains, and in the tombs, crying, and cutting himself with stones. But when he saw Jesus afar off, he ran and worshipped him, And cried with a loud voice, and said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of the most high God? I adjure thee by God, that thou torment me not. For he said unto him, Come out of the man, thou unclean spirit. And he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered, saying, My name is Legion: for we are many.”

Detail of the sculpted relief in west doorway, Église Abbatiale Sainte-Marie, Souillac (Lot) Photo by Dennis Aubrey

“Legion” refers to the Roman legions which occupied the Roman province of Judaea in the lifetime of Jesus. A typical legion was comprised of about 5,000 soldiers, but later the passage in Mark says that there were 2,000 demons. So “Legion” in this passage is a name that refers to a great multitude, in this case, a multitude of demons who inhabited the man with the unclean spirit.

To me, the demon represents the torment of doubt, pain, and chaos that assault the spirit. The name Legion represents all of the multitudes of doubts, pains, and chaoses that relentlessly assail us in the night.

Medieval sculptors knew Legion well. We can see that knowledge in the depictions of the demons and torments to which they gave shape. There was no shortage of terror, suffering, and rending of flesh by the monsters and demons, all made visible by the skill of the carvers.

Demons, Basilique Sainte Madeleine, Vézelay (Yonne) Photo by Dennis Aubrey

I like to think that in the creative moment, the hands and eyes and heart and mind combine to create a vision that summons knowledge from all parts of one’s being. I feel that this is what we see in these medieval sculptures. By putting shape and form to the nightmares, they gained some measure of control back from the dark forces. I am not sure who said it, but I read once that the more rationally we live our lives, the more chaotic and irrational is our dream life. In the time of these churches, life addressed both the rational and the irrational. Thomas Aquinas showed how God ordered the universe, and these carvers showed our mortality and the ephemeral nature of our worldly accomplishments.

Detail of the trumeau, Église Abbatiale Sainte-Marie, Souillac (Lot) Photo by Dennis Aubrey

Today, in the long night, there is for me no consolation in philosophy or religion. Even Boethius cannot help when he says, “No man can ever truly be secure until he has been forsaken by Fortune.” And I have always liked reading C.S. Lewis, but this great proponent of Christianity stated, “Talk to me about the truth of religion and I’ll listen gladly. Talk to me about the duty of religion and I’ll listen submissively. But don’t come talking to me about the consolations of religion or I shall suspect that you don’t understand.” A Grief Observed (1961)

Fall of Simon Magus, Cathédrale Saint Lazare, Autun (Côte-d’Or) Photo by Dennis Aubrey

So I find no consolation or reassurance. I am left with my fears and doubts. And no matter where I turn, I find nothing that helps.

I have a need, but not a means.

But with the first light of dawn, with the first loud call from our wren in the tree outside, there is hope.

18 responses to “My Name is Legion (Dennis Aubrey)

  1. I ache reading this, guessing the depths of torment that prompted the first, “My name is Legion,” and also your thoughts in the middle of the night. And, as C.S. Lewis said, religion itself cannot provide consolation. It is more than religion. It is the recognition of the I Am, as with the tormented soul who adjured Jesus not to further torment him. It isn’t religion, but a discovery and embrace of the Source. In my opinion.

  2. I have often wondered why a fear or worry which is so daunting in the dark of night, faithfully abates upon arrival of a new day’s light.

    I think religious consolation is largely an emotional response to having one’s needs met; faith is a decision of one’s will when consolation disappoints.

  3. THe consolation of divine faith is Hope! And Nature’s beauty is the miraculous creativity that we all share. We are.the stuff of stars- all is one.

  4. Dennis,
    Can you give me an office email where I could elaborate on your ideas from my professional chair.

  5. Dennis, Your photographic art is exquisite. Thank you for the joy it brings me and others. Often my passing observation when I see the venerable vaults and arches includes wonder about man’s constant reaching out to the divine. The architecture, perfect and enduring, is so different from human existence full of chaos and nightmares. There is a kind of Daoist duality in an energy that exudes from fearful nights to promote artistic beauty in the day. Irving Stone chose “Agony” and “Ecstacy” for his novel’s title, as an example.
    I pray your struggle comes to a peaceful balance soon. Please continue to seek the Divine as you perform your art. -Charles

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.